I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
