She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
