brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
