I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
it's like heaven, but drunker
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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