I must be too annoying 4 u.
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize