would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
My ass is underappreciated
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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