At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
