Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize