right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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