drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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