you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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