everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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