Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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