He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
