its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize