are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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