you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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