Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize