well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I think people are normalizing furries
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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