Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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