idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
