This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
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