thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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