if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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