i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
