Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
