just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
