Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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