All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize