wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize