Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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