My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
birth control should be required to get into college
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I want to be your penis for a week.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
