i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize