I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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