Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
