OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I have fence marks all over my body
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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