I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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