worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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