therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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