Three words: puerto rican gang bang
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
