It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
