pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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