I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
