she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
