i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize