When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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