do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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