she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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