My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
