Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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