so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
