if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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