I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Dear god my vagina.
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